A young woman was about to finish her first year of university. Like so many others her age, she considered herself to be Labour Party minded, and she was very much in favour of higher taxes to support her education and for more government programmes – in other words, the redistribution of wealth.
She was deeply-ashamed that her father was a rather staunch, blue-ribbon Conservative, a feeling she openly expressed. Based on the lectures that she had attended, and the occasional chat with a professor, she felt that her father had, for years, harboured a selfish desire to keep what he thought should be his.
One day, she was challenging her father on his opposition to higher taxes on the rich and the need for more government programmes. The self-professed objectivity proclaimed by her professors must be the truth, and she indicated so to her father. He responded by asking how she was doing at university.
Taken aback, she answered rather haughtily that she had a 90% average, and let him know that it was tough to maintain, insisting that she was taking a very difficult course load and was constantly studying, which left her no time to go out and party like other people she knew. She didn't even have time for a boyfriend, and didn't really have many university friends because she spent all her time studying.
Her father listened and then asked, “How is your friend Audrey doing?” She replied, “Audrey is barely getting by. All she takes are easy classes, she never studies and she barely has a 50% average. She is so popular on campus - university for her is a blast. She's always invited to all the parties, and lots of times she doesn't even show up for classes because she's too hung over.”
Her wise father asked his daughter, “Why don't you go to the Dean's office and ask him to deduct 20% off your average and give it to your friend who only has 50%? That way, you will both have a 70% average. It would be fair and you would both be equal.”
The daughter, visibly shocked by her father's suggestion, angrily fired back, “That's a crazy idea! How would that be fair? I've worked really hard for my grades! I've invested a lot of time and a lot of hard work! Audrey has done next to nothing toward her degree. She played while I worked my off!”
The father slowly smiled, winked and said gently, “Welcome to the Conservative side of the fence.”
If you ever wondered what side of the fence you sit on, this is a great test!
If a Conservative supporter doesn't like guns, he doesn't buy one.
If a Labour/Green doesn't like guns, they want all guns out-lawed.
If a Conservative is a vegetarian, he doesn't eat meat.
If a Labour/Green is a vegetarian, he wants all meat products banned for everyone.
If a Conservative is gay, he quietly leads his life.
If a Labour/Green is gay, he demands legislated respect.
If a Conservative is down-and-out, he thinks about how to better his situation.
A Labour/Green wonders who is going to take care of him.
If a Conservative doesn't like a chat-show host, he switches channels.
Labour/Greens demand those should be banned.
If a Conservative is a non-believer, he doesn't go to church.
A Labour/Green non-believer wants any mention of God and religion silenced. (Unless it's a foreign religion, of course!)
If a Conservative reads this, he'll forward it, so his friends can have a good laugh.
A Labour/Green will delete it because he's "offended”.
Am I Gammon or Woke ? - I neither know nor care.
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2nd Nov 2017 6:51 pm
DSL Keeper of the wheelie bin
Member Since: 11 May 2006
Location: Off again! :-)
Posts: 72771
Sums it all up nicely.
2nd Nov 2017 6:57 pm
astonbuilder
Member Since: 29 Sep 2006
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works for me
2nd Nov 2017 7:10 pm
DG Site Moderator
Member Since: 12 Dec 2005
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Christ ...Nigel has resorted to importing American based fake news now
2nd Nov 2017 7:11 pm
Pelyma
Member Since: 06 Jan 2005
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Seems true to me.DS3 TDV6 HSE - Silver with Alpaca (old one) Gone
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2nd Nov 2017 7:16 pm
Canburne
Member Since: 15 Jan 2013
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Ergo DG is a socialist .
"the inherent vice of capitalism is the unequal sharing of blessings....the inherent vice of socialism is the equal sharing of miseries" Winston Churchill
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2nd Nov 2017 7:20 pm
Mogwyth
Member Since: 03 Oct 2014
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Posts: 3976
Seem about right to me of to share this now. ==================================
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2nd Nov 2017 7:22 pm
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2nd Nov 2017 8:06 pm
bigdave Site Sponsor
Member Since: 04 Jul 2008
Location: Cornwall
Posts: 9868
About right!!!
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Member Since: 12 Dec 2005
Location: The Gaff
Posts: 50934
Quote:
If a Conservative supporter doesn't like guns, he doesn't buy one.
ISTR the Tory government banned guns in 1996
Quote:
If a Conservative is a vegetarian, he doesn't eat meat.
The late Tory minister Alan Clark was a vegetarian and passionate supporter of animal rights, he joined activists in demonstrations against live export and slaughter he also supported the Animal Liberation Front.
Quote:
If a Conservative is gay, he quietly leads his life.
stood in the closet ...waiting to be "cured" by Stephen Crabb
Quote:
If a Conservative is down-and-out, he thinks about how to better his situation.
Look at him thinking 'I'm so proud of my side of the fence increasing 'down and out' street sleeping opportunities by 134% since 2010'
Quote:
If a Conservative doesn't like a chat-show host, he switches channels.
Conservative, Mary Whitehouse, the UK's greatest proponent of banning things on TV might have disagreed.
Quote:
If a Conservative is a non-believer, he doesn't go to church.
A Labour/Green will delete it because he's "offended”.
My ar$e
2nd Nov 2017 9:24 pm
Pelyma
Member Since: 06 Jan 2005
Location: Patching, Sussex
Posts: 15496
The Tories banned handguns except .22 calibre; Tony Blair banned them too.DS3 TDV6 HSE - Silver with Alpaca (old one) Gone
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2nd Nov 2017 10:02 pm
DG Site Moderator
Member Since: 12 Dec 2005
Location: The Gaff
Posts: 50934
Gun is guns bub
2nd Nov 2017 10:03 pm
Pelyma
Member Since: 06 Jan 2005
Location: Patching, Sussex
Posts: 15496
Let’s not let the truth get in the way heh? DS3 TDV6 HSE - Silver with Alpaca (old one) Gone
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2nd Nov 2017 10:54 pm
DG Site Moderator
Member Since: 12 Dec 2005
Location: The Gaff
Posts: 50934
Did the tories ban guns or not?
2nd Nov 2017 11:01 pm
Pelyma
Member Since: 06 Jan 2005
Location: Patching, Sussex
Posts: 15496
Not all no, then we have the fact that Labour banned hunting with dogs, but make a criminal of me if my dog kills a mouse but not a rat, or a hare but not a rabbit.DS3 TDV6 HSE - Silver with Alpaca (old one) Gone
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off!”
