Member Since: 18 Jul 2011
Location: Stockport
Posts: 7830
And the relevance of him having big shoes is...........?Mods:
Front Fogs + Halos
FBH Remote Control
The 1st Ever RRS Modded Grill
Garmin Nuvi + D4 Surround + Reversing Camera.
D4 Steering Wheel.
Rear Boot Spoiler.
Twin Brake Lights.
Wing Mirror Indicator Repeaters.
Long Roof Rails
Make your own Narpy grill thread
I'm not scared, I'm outta here.
22nd Dec 2017 5:23 pm
Grianaig
Member Since: 08 Jul 2014
Location: Tyne and Wear
Posts: 1286
Better not to mention the pronunciation of "menziesii". Douglas Fir was at one time named in Britain, Pseudotsugadouglasii . 2014 MY Discovery XS Indus Silver. Sadly gone. Second last LR of forty eight years continuous ownership.
They could not find 3 wise men and a virgin The happiest of people don't necessarily have the best of everything;
They just make the best of everything they have.
22nd Dec 2017 6:22 pm
Narpy
Member Since: 18 Jul 2011
Location: Stockport
Posts: 7830
Not bad that Mark, beats the hell out of the big shuey gag any way. Mods:
Front Fogs + Halos
FBH Remote Control
The 1st Ever RRS Modded Grill
Garmin Nuvi + D4 Surround + Reversing Camera.
D4 Steering Wheel.
Rear Boot Spoiler.
Twin Brake Lights.
Wing Mirror Indicator Repeaters.
Long Roof Rails
Make your own Narpy grill thread
I'm not scared, I'm outta here.
22nd Dec 2017 6:27 pm
galwaygreen
Member Since: 30 Oct 2011
Location: plymouth
Posts: 6525
the burnley ones a cracker
22nd Dec 2017 6:47 pm
OJ
Member Since: 01 Oct 2017
Location: Loch Leven
Posts: 725
Narpy wrote:
And the relevance of him having big shoes is...........?
Big feet
22nd Dec 2017 7:33 pm
gstuart
Member Since: 21 Oct 2016
Location: kent
Posts: 13648
Why did the snowman have a smile on his face
Because the snowblower was coming down the block.
22nd Dec 2017 8:00 pm
Pelyma
Member Since: 06 Jan 2005
Location: Patching, Sussex
Posts: 15496
Aerialmark wrote:
Why was Jesus Christ not born in Burnley ?
They could not find 3 wise men and a virgin
My mother in law just got the hump about that joke, she’s from Burnley- keep them coming DS3 TDV6 HSE - Silver with Alpaca (old one) Gone
DS3 TDV6 HSE- Silver with Alpaca (new one) Gone
D4 HSE Lux - Montalcino Red Gone
Porsche Cayenne V8 Diesel S
Tell her its ok so am I Merry Christmas The happiest of people don't necessarily have the best of everything;
They just make the best of everything they have.
22nd Dec 2017 8:42 pm
OJ
Member Since: 01 Oct 2017
Location: Loch Leven
Posts: 725
Narpy wrote:
there is currently doubt if humour has migrated as far north as Scotland this Christmas judging by recent attempts.
Oh dear, really sorry Narpy, will try better, hows this one.
Hi Bob, This is Alan next door.
I have a confession to make. I've been riddled with guilt these past few
months and have been trying to pluck up the courage to tell you to your
face, but I am at least now telling you in text as I can't live with myself
a moment longer without you knowing.
The truth is I have been sharing your wife, day and night when you're not
around. In fact, probably more than you. I haven't been getting it at home
recently, but that's no excuse, I know. The temptation was just too much.
I can no longer live with the guilt and I hope you will accept my sincerest
apologies and forgive me. It won't happen again.
Please suggest a fee for usage, and I'll pay you.
Regards, Alan.
Bob's reaction
Bob, feeling insulted and betrayed, grabbed his gun, and shot his neighbour
dead. He returned home where he poured himself a stiff drink and sat down
on the sofa. He took out his phone where he saw he has a subsequent message
from his neighbour:
*THE SECOND MESSAGE*
Hi Bob, This is Alan next door again. Sorry about the typo on my last text.
I expect you figured it out anyway, & that you noticed that darned
Autocorrect changed 'Wi-Fi' To 'Wife'. Technology hey?
Any better?
22nd Dec 2017 9:53 pm
Narpy
Member Since: 18 Jul 2011
Location: Stockport
Posts: 7830
Member Since: 29 Sep 2006
Location: MIDLANDS
Posts: 8052
Well, if we’re telling long one’s
Jesus and St. Peter playing golf. St. Peter steps up to the tee on a par three and hits one long and straight. It reaches the green.
Jesus is up next. He slices it. It heads over the fence into traffic on an adjacent street. Bounces off a truck, onto the roof of a nearby shack and into the rain gutter, down the drain pipe and onto a lily pad at the edge of a lake. A frog jumps up and snatches the ball in his mouth. An eagle swoops down, grabs the frog. As the eagle flies over the green, the frog croaks and drops the ball. It drops in the hole.
Saint Peter looks at Jesus, exasperated. "Are you gonna play golf"? he asks "Or are you just gonna f**k around"?
He's the one feeding bread to the helicopters !The happiest of people don't necessarily have the best of everything;
They just make the best of everything they have.
22nd Dec 2017 10:25 pm
OJ
Member Since: 01 Oct 2017
Location: Loch Leven
Posts: 725
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